migas and microwaves rule!

i inherited my first microwave
a little over a year ago
from my grandfather.
wow, i thought,
this is so not what i wanted out of this deal.
nevertheless, the microwave was all mine so,
i swooped her up
and carried her back to connecticut
where
i bought our first box of microwaveable popcorn,
not that that was easy with the brazilians* of varieties
staring you down in the microwaveable popcorn aisle.
i think i went for the one with the word natural in the title.
or maybe it was the word real.
whatever.
i broke a tooth and had to have it extracted.

my microwave skepticism remained unshaken,
in fact,
entrenched,
until the night i had a hankering for a sweet potato.
and i wanted it "now"!
so, i tossed it in the microwave,
fork pierced and lovingly wrapped in a damp piece of paper towel,
when lo and behold,
4 minutes later,
a microwave miracle occurred.

and you wanna know something else?
if you invert a glass candle holder onto a piece of paper towel
and nuke it in 30 second intervals, the pesky wax melts right out.
and if your brown sugar hardens, just pop it in the nuke for a few
seconds until it softens again.
ditto with crystallized honey.
and so on.

microwaves also cook a mean migas in minutes
when your guests arrive on time
on xmas morning
but
you have momentarily lost track of time
not
because you are overwhelmed by the mountain of thoughtful
gifts you hope await you under the tree
which as it turns out isn't the tree you selected
even after careful examination of every last remaining affordable
and
of reasonable heighth
what is it with people who say that?
tree
but remain unopened
because the kids refuse to wake up before
two, three, four in the afternoon
but
because you're reading the new york times.

Baked Migas with Chipotle Hollandaise and Guac
Makes one 8 x 12 ceramic casserole dish worth which easily feeds eight.

14 eggs
2 cups 1/2 and 1/2
2 jalepenos, very small dice
4 scallions, small dice
1/2 stick butter
1/4-1/2 pound chorizo, very small dice (can be pulsed in cuis if not too lazy)
8 corn tortillas, cut into strips (not tortilla chips but tortillas you would use for a
fish taco)
2 to 3 loose cups shredded cheddar

Butter the inside of a ceramic casserole dish.
Sweat the jalepenos and scallions in half of the butter over medium low heat.
Remove to a bowl. Add remaining butter to pan and saute chorizo, again over
medium low heat, until slightly brown.
Meanwhile, whisk the eggs and the 1/2 and 1/2 in a large bowl. Add the scallion mix, the chorizo, the remaining ingredients, and some sea salt. Pour into the prepared dish and wrap tightly with saran wrap. Microwave in 4 minute intervals for approximately 17 minutes or until eggs are fluffy and firm. Use extra care when unwrapping the dish...the steam under there is killer. Serve with a generous ladle of Chipotle Hollandaise, a dollop of Guacamole and plenty of spanish cava.

It's fucking delicious, pardon my french.

Chipotle Hollandaise
Makes about one cup, which honestly, was not enough.

3 egg yolks
1-2 tablespoons lemon juice
2 sticks unsalted butter, melted
2 T chipotle puree
sea salt

Whisk the yolks and the lemon juice in a bowl, then set over a pot of lightly simmering water, continuing to whisk until mixture is pale and thickened. Slowly whisk in melted butter, removing the bowl from the heat periodically to prevent the eggs from scrambling, until sauce is thickened. Remove from heat completely and add the chipotle puree and salt. Keep in warm spot until ready to use. You may add warm water to thin sauce if necessary.

Note. This is another variable recipe. You can use herbs, mustards, different citrus juices and zests, tomato, wines, spices, etc. Some of the variations will be classics. Others will be your own invention. Play with it!


Guacamole
1 Avocado's worth

1 Avocado
splash of lemon or lime juice
2 T cilantro, chopped
some garlic, scallion, cumin, tabasco, S, P.
diced tomato, optional.

Mash the avocado in a small bowl. Add remaining ingredients, to taste.

eat.

a side note. thanks bri.

*a reference to one of my favorite jokes which goes a little something like this...

Donald Rumsfeld is briefing George Bush in the Oval Office. "Oh and finally, sir, three Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq today." Bush goes pale, his jaw hanging open in stunned disbelief. He buries his face in his hands, muttering "My God...My God". "Mr. President," says Rumsfeld, "we lose soldiers all the time, and it's terrible. But I've never seen you so upset. What's the matter?" Bush looks up and asks..."Exactly how many is a Brazilian again?"